A Hollywood Ending Deserves a Hollywood Cast

June 15, 2010 - Los Angeles, CALIFORNIA, UNITED STATES - epa02204166 Boston Celtics player Rajon Rondo (R) fights for the ball against Los Angeles Lakers player Lamar Odom (L) during the first half of game six of the NBA Finals at Staples Center in Los Angeles, California, USA, 15 June 2010. Boston leads the series 3-2 for the best of seven games.

It’s finally here.

Lakers-Celtics.

Game 7.

Something my dad has been telling me about for years. The list of NBA greats who took part in this epic battle spans generations: West, Russell, Chamberlain, Cousy, Baylor, Havlicek, Jabbar, McHale, Worthy, Bird, and of course, Magic.

Kobe Bryant won’t admit it, but this means more than facing the Orlando Magic or the Cleveland Cavaliers. He’s a student of the game who doesn’t need anyone to explain the historical ramifications of beating the Boston Celtics.

But since we’re all here, why don’t we touch on a few reasons why it’s so important?

It starts with the number 2, which represents how many championships the Lakers trail the Celtics for the right to be called the Greatest Franchise in NBA History. You think Kobe wants to go down as leading the second best team the league has ever seen? Me neither.

Then there’s the “The Club”. Michael Cooper talked about this before the series began, but apparently there is an exclusive club that only the ’85 and ’87 Lakers belong to. I’m sure there’s a hand shake, secret meetings and super-weird-masquerade-sex-parties like in Eyes Wide Shut. You think Kobe wants to sneak into those creepy galas like Tom Cruise? Of course not, he wants to waltz in through the front door.

Above all, there is pride. Kobe Bryant and his Lakers teammates do not want history to remember the 2009 NBA Finals as “The Year KG Hurt His Knee”. I know this hurts Lakers fans, but if the Lakers lose tonight’s game then that will happen. Kobe’s 4th title will be cheapened by the ridiculous notion that his Lakers only got to the top because the one team capable of knocking them off was not at 100%. I don’t know about you, but the thought of Bill Simmons and his clan of leprechauns holding that over our heads for the next 15 years is not something I can stomach.

And neither can Kobe Bryant. He wants history to note that in 2008 Pau Gasol had yet to play 50 games in the purple and gold, a mulligan of sorts. Hey, mulligans happen in the NBA, just ask Mike Jordan and the 1995 Chicago Bulls (Nick Anderson, who?).

If the Lakers win, they are the back-to-back Champs with a shot at two 3-Peats (©Riley, Patrick) in a decade. So while a surly Kobe Bryant sits at the podium with his lips pursed, remember that nobody in that room cares more about history and legacy than that man. He knows what’s on the line. He’ll be ready.

But for the Lakers to win, they need to be more than Kobe Bryant. They need to be equal parts Pau Gasol, with a dash of Ron Artest and a heavy helping of Lamar Odom. They need Andrew Bynum crashing and Shannon Brown flying. It wouldn’t necessarily be a bad thing to see DJ Mbenga get a bucket or two.

One thing is for sure. Game 7 in Staples Center will bring us a Hollywood ending. And for that ending to truly be a Pursuit of Happiness, the Los Angeles Lakers are going to have to embody the spirits of some of the most famous characters in movie history.

If each member of the Lakers lives up to their movie character counterpart, we can schedule a parade for Saturday morning down Figueroa.

Without further ado, I bring to you Hollywood’s finest and their purple and gold understudies.

Next: Phil in the Blank

Phil Jackson: Coach Norman Dale (Hoosiers)

“I’ve seen you guys can shoot but there’s more to the game than shooting. There’s fundamentals and defense.”

Not usually the “Ra Ra” type, Coach Jackson would best be served taking a look at some of the motivational speeches Gene Hackman delivered in the 1986 classic, Hoosiers. Is this a hokey selection on my part? Absolutely. But this is Game 7, where X’s and O’s can be thrown out the window.

This game is about who wants it more. Right now, Phil’s number one priority is motivating his team like he’s never done before. He must remind them to do the dirty work and remember that it’s defense, not offense, that wins championships. The Lakers should forget about the glitz and glam of Hollywood, ignore the A-List celebs filling the courtside seats and get down to business. It’s time to roll up your sleeves, get dirty, and bring home the Larry O-Brian trophy.

It was either this, or the speech that Dawson gave at halftime during Varsity Blues. If Phil can motivate his team half as well as Van Der Beek did, he’ll be wiping champagne from his eyes around 9:15pm.

Next: Captain of the Fish

Derek Fisher: Captain John H Miller (Saving Private Ryan)

“Earn this… earn it.”

In Spielberg’s 1998 war epic Tom Hanks played the role of Captain John H Miller, a man who fearlessly led his men into battle. A seasoned veteran from a small town, Captain Miller led his team of men through hell in order to save the life of one Private Ryan (queue up the “Matt Damon” voice from the Team America soundboard).

When things look bleak and Captain Miller’s team lost sight of why they were there, he reminded them of the end goal. When his men needed him most, he never let them down. Captain Miller was a leader of men, as dependable as they come.

Sound familiar?

If the Lakers are to prevail tonight, they will need their emotional leader to keep them grounded and keep their eyes on the prize. Will Derek Fisher please stand up?

Next: Cut Me Vitti

Andrew Bynum: Rocky Balboa (Rocky)

“’Cause all I wanna do is go the distance. Nobody’s ever gone the distance with Creed, and if I can go that distance, you see, and that bell rings and I’m still standin’, I’m gonna know for the first time in my life, see, that I weren’t just another bum from the neighborhood.”

Before Mr. T.

Before frolicking in the ocean with Apollo.

Before Tommy Gunns.

There was just Rocky, a gritty dude from South Philly who no one expected to make it to the final bell. He was overmatched and beaten down, but he would never give up. No matter how many times Apollo thought he delivered the knock out blow, Rocky refused to go down. In one of the most unexpected outcomes in movie history, Rocky showed more guts in the ring than anyone thought he had.

Andrew Bynum is facing a similar challenge.

Admit it, you expected Andrew to quit by now. Once you heard about the torn meniscus on Big Drew’s knee you didn’t think he’d make it to the end, did you? With all his injuries over the past few years, you expected Drew to shrivel up and disappear once things got tough.

When you heard he had a bum knee (again), you got on the phone with Mitch Kupchak and begged him to trade Bynum for Bosh.

You didn’t think the kid had any heart. You didn’t think he could play through pain. You didn’t think he could hack it.

Well ladies and gentleman, it’s Game 7 of the NBA Finals and Andrew Bynum is still standing. I can’t say the same about Kendrick Perkins.

Bet you didn’t think you’d read those words two weeks ago.

Next: The Taxi Driver

Ron Artest: Travis Bickle (Taxi Driver)

“The idea had been growing in my brain for some time: TRUE force. All the king’s men cannot put it back together again.”

Crazy can be a scary thing. Crazy can make you talk to yourself in the mirror. Crazy can make you shave your head into a Mohawk. Crazy can win you a championship.

I know we keep coming back to this, but Dennis Rodman was one of the craziest dudes the NBA has ever seen. He’s also one of the greatest champions in professional sports. Ron Artest has the opportunity to join him.

In Taxi Driver Bob DeNiro played a crazy, war torn loner who drove a cab around 1970s NYC. He was misunderstood, but extremely loyal. From the opening credits, we watched as he was wound up tighter and tighter by what he saw as the degradation of society. It wasn’t a matter of if he would snap, but when.
But in the end it wasn’t a rampage at a political rally that would define him, but the sort of vigilante justice that only DeNiro could pull off. He saved the life of a teenage Jodie Foster, took a few bullets for good measure, and wound up as the unlikeliest of heroes.

When Lamar Odom talks about his childhood friend Ron Artest, he often uses the words misunderstood and loyal. No one on the Lakers wants to fit in more than Ron Ron. He’s had a rough go in the NBA Finals, but before all is said and done I expect Ron Ron to give us a moment or two that we will remember for years to come.

Ron Artest, the unlikely hero. Has a nice ring to it, doesn’t it?

Next: Going Solo in a Star Wars

Lamar Odom: Han Solo (Star Wars)

“Well, don’t look at me, pal. I just said you were a fair pilot. I didn’t know they were looking for somebody to lead this crazy attack.”

Han Solo was the quintessential reluctant hero. The man had all the physical tools to lead men to victory, but seemingly none of the mental prowess to put it all together. Han Solo was the most talented pilot this side of Alderaan, but he was stuck flying around in the hunk of metal known as the Mellennium Falcon. He had the street savvy to win any fight, but he was the constant under achiever. He spent most of Return of the Jedi frozen in carbonite, but when Luke needed him most he rose to the occasion.

I know it seems like Lamar Odom has been frozen in carbonite for most of the NBA Finals, but he’s actually logged 157 minutes of time. It’s true.

The enigma that is Lamar Odom will never surprise me. If he comes out and gets 3 fouls in 2 minutes, I expect it. If he comes out and scores 21 points and grabs 14 rebounds, I expect it. There is a 100% chance I yell “Holy s**t, Lamar Odom is in the building” or “Nice to see you Lamar” at some point during Game 7. It’s a mortal lock.
I wish we could depend on Lamar more than we can, but then he wouldn’t be Lamar.

I think back to Game 5 of the 2009 NBA Finals, the biggest game of his life, and I remember Lamar Odom rising to the occasion.

Dare I say he does it again?

Next: The Gladiator

Pau Gasol: Maximus Decimus Meridius (Gladiator)

“You can help me. Whatever comes out of these gates, we’ve got a better chance of survival if we work together. Do you understand? If we stay together we survive.”

If I could see one thing in this NBA Finals tonight, it would be this:
Pau Gasol drives down the lane and delivers a thunderous dunk over the top of Kevin Garnett, who falls to the ground and instinctually assumes the fetal position. Pau Gasol then heads to center court and yells to the crowd, “Are you not entertained? Are you not entertained? Is this not why you are here?” All the while the rabid Staples Center crowd chants: “Spaniard! Spaniard! Spaniard!”

Would this not be the best case scenario for tonight?

If the Lakers do wind up victorious, they will need that mentality from their Spaniard. He needs to be tough. He needs to be strong. He needs to be a warrior.

A big performance tonight will bury that “soft” 2008 performance deeper in the back of our minds. If he can be the fearless leader in the paint, he will be collecting his second ring in October.

Next: FREEEE DOMMMM

Kobe Bryant: William Wallace (Braveheart)

“Aye, fight and you may die. Run, and you’ll live… at least a while. And dying in your beds, many years from now, would you be willin’ to trade ALL the days, from this day to that, for one chance, just one chance, to come back here and fight?”

A young William Wallace once told his dad, “I can fight”. A proud father looked down at his son and responded with the words of wisdom only a father can provide: “I know. I know you can fight. But it’s our wits that make us men.”

Before the craziness that was his Malibu DUI and The Passion of the Christ, Mel Gibson was a bad ass. And at no point was he a bigger bad ass then when he portrayed William Wallace in Braveheart. The man was responsible for uniting the Scottish Army and leading the charge for freedom against a superior military super power.

Wallace was the ultimate leader, a man who could inspire his men to fight with him and fight for him. He knew he couldn’t do it on his own, so he was forced to instill his men with the same confidence he had and lead them into battle. He was so fixated on one thing, he was willing to sacrifice anything to achieve that goal.
We all know Kobe Bryant can fight. It’s his wits that have worried us over the years.

Tonight, Kobe Bryant must do the same thing William Wallace did in Braveheart. For years it was argued that “Kobe doesn’t make his teammates better”. For years people have pointed to Game 7 in Phoenix as the ultimate trump card in the KB v MJ debate. For years people have doubted Kobe’s ability to lead his team to victory.

Tonight, Kobe Bryant has the chance to build not only a legacy but a legend. In the NBA, stars shine brightest on the biggest stages. Secretly the Boston Celtics are hoping that Kobe wants to win so badly that he alienates his teammates and tries to do it all by himself. If this were 2004 Kobe, I’d say there was a 95% chance that happens. But 2010 Kobe is a little older and, more importantly, a little wiser. He has learned from his past mistakes and knows he is much more valuable when he is building his teammates up, and not icing them out. At this point it his career Kobe Bryant wants to win, and he is willing to sacrifice anything to make it happen.

Tonight, Kobe Bryant wins his 5th NBA Championship ring.

You think anything will prevent that from happening?

Me neither.

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